Definitely,we screwed up our A*STAR Science Competition!!!In fact,I thought that we were well-prepared,but then,we were totally owned by judges...=.=...They asked a lot of stupid and unreasonable questions which made me really wanted to kick their asses!Their questions were so unexpected and actually,for some questions,they even did not know what the hell did themselves ask for...

Our sicence project was quite simple,the aim of project was just investigate and compare the usefulness and difference among the papers which made by different materials.However,the two dump dump judges did not think so,they might think that we were plan to open a paper making factory!The first stupid question they asked was could they got hurt by using our paper...o.O...They thought that as we used sodium hydroxide to pulp the fibres thus the paper made might be poisonous...What the hell?We made paper to write,not to eat as food!Also,we used low concentration of sodium hydroxide,not the kind of very high concentration which can kill people!They even did not know what was mole?I believed that they were really stupid untill cannot stupid anymore!!!

The second question which made me want to kill them was they said if a professor who from NUS interested in our project,how would we contact with him?o.O???How can I know?Call him or e-mail him?They also talked about standard way to test the quality of papers,even though the questions seems to be reasonable,they forgot about that we were just students!We did not have so much money to buy the expensive apparatus and our school also could not provide to us...I believed that they asked these questions just want to show how smart they were,but in fact,they were the most idiot guys I ever have seen on this earth!It was because everytime before they tried to ask something,they obviously did not use their brains to think about it...I believed that this was such a waste that they had human brains in their heads but never use them before...=.=

The last thing which made me angry with them was they were earth killer but money lover.Nowadays,every countries tried to put their own effort to save the earth,but they really did not care about our environment and put economy at first position!We said that after sugarcane used to make sugar,the things left could be used as a paper making source,but they said burn them to generate electricity will be a better way as that way could get more economic benefits...They were definitely the kind of person who change our beautiful earth to bloody hell as the only thing they wanted was money,money and much more money...=.=

Anyway,the competition was done,this should be the last competition I joined in my secondary life,I hoped that we could get a perfect ending but after we met such critical-sick judges,will we get what we really want?After everyone put so much effort,will the only thing we get back is disappointment?

Today I spent whole day to practise calligraphy,my parents got shocked as I have not practised it for almost 10 years.In fact,I hated calligraphy,it was because my parents forced me to learn it when I was only 6 years old...I had to stay at home and wrote a lot of pages of calligraphy when other children played outside...For me,calligraphy was one of the killers who killed my childhood even though everytime my Chinese teachers said that because of calligraphy I could write very beautiful Chinese words...but today,I really found some kind of feeling which I never found it before during the practice.The feeling was peace!

Actually,I practised calligraphy just because I need to write the word "谦"(our class name) on our class pullover.My original purpose was try to write the word more perfect and beautiful,but during the practice,I found peaceful feeling.It was very weied that I did not have such feeling during the time when I learning calligraphy(I spent totally about 3 years to learn it).I enjoyed the feeling of peace as recently,my life really drove me crazy!Confusion,lost,sadness and all of the negative motions have became the main rhyme of my life.I got no mood to study or even to do examination paper(that's why recently most part of my paper is blank...=.=).Anyway,the peacefully feeling made me find back the real me,even it was temporarily,I still quite enjoyed it...

Maybe after all of this time,I will start to practise callipgraphy again and treat it as one of my hobby,I may also start to seal cutting(篆刻-another kind of Chinese traditional cultrue) again...I think soon,the cultural Ma Sai will be back^^

Recently I was either very suay or very busy...no mood or no time blogging.Now,let me tell you what happened to me during these few days...

Wednesday:
1)Our precious PE lesson got cancelled just because a stupid supervisor!!!He was really an extra man...=.=
2)Anyway,I did not waste my time,I used the PE lesson to copy math homework...xD

Thursday:
1)I got heart pain and difficulty in breathing...I had to leave school at about 12:30 and sent to a private clinic.After about 15 minutes check,the doctor told me that my heart was healthy...but my physical pains were caused by mental problem=.=...(since when he became a psychologist?)Anyway,I did not know what did he say to my father,I did not think that I will die soon...=.=
2)I felt very uncomfortable today and slept for about 10 hours...

Friday:
1)Physics O level SPA skill 3 test on today!!!>.<...I did not read the notes which Mr. Chang gave us yesterday at all as I got sick...=.=...Anyway,the bad new was I did not do perfect in test,the good new was,I did not screw it.From now on,as all the physics SPA tests were done,I could either threw the physics SPA book or burn it...xD
2)I played basketball with WeiSheng,KaiYang,HongSen and others,I got about 20+ rebounds,20+ points,5+ steals,3+ blocks and 5+ assists in about 40 minutes...HAHA,I got fun=)
3)I got scolded by my father just because I played basketball.He said that doctor suggested me took a good rest and better did not do any exercise...He said I might get killed by just playing basketball...Anyway,I did not think I will die so easily...xD
4)My father bought another bottle of Remy Martin Louis 13...Muhahaha,maybe I should try to drink it again...xD
5)My father bought a new laptop...At first,I thought he bought it for me,but actually,he bought it for himself to check his stock...=.=
6)Today,my father was really happy as his stocks earned him about $90000 even though he still suffered about $10000 loss...He played these stocks for almost 2 years and he always lost money...=.=...Anyway.money were earned by him.

Saturday:
1)I went to eat lunch with HongSen,WeiSheng,Dominic,Perlin,Janna and others...I did not eat anything...I tried to lose weight recently as my 6 pieces were going to disappear!!!I ate too many chocolates and ice-cream...=.=
2)After lunch,I followed WeiSheng,Perlin,Dominic and Shermaine to play basketball...I had fun...If Janna and HongSen could follow us then would be better...but unfortunatelly,they got tuition...
3)I reached a basketball court where near VJC at about 6 pm and played a friendly match.I played as a PF(power forward) and got 25 points,21rebounds,5blocks,3assists and 6 steals during 48 minutes...I really enjoyed the match!!!
4)I did not eat dinner...LOSE WEIGHT!!!

Tagboard:
To Russell:You know why I start to prey on boys?It is because I either got rejected or hurt by girls!I really cannot take the pain anymore...T.T

To YA:I promise that I will keep touching your bum and I will keep it up...=)Also,if as you said you only gave =.= face when you feel very bored,then you must be very bored in every day,every hour,every minute and every second...It is because your face always like that...=.=...But I love your bored face...xD

To my dear Mr. Tan Yoong Aunn:

My cute sweet stunning Tan Yoong Aunn,now,I officially announce that I have to divorce with you.When the word "divorce" came from my mouth,I really could feel the pains.I really really really really really really really love you,but why you abandoned me and fell in love with a stupid gay whose name is Valerian Neo?It is true that I am more handsome,charmful and rich than him!I really could not understand why you betrayed me...Is it just because he is more gay than me?Is it the only reason why you fell in love with him?Now,I know that you are not only a gay,but also a flirt gay!

Tan Yoong Aunn,I am really disappointed about you!From your face,the only thing I could see is honesty...but under your honest face,you are such a dirty person!I really want to tell everyone that you are a 披着羊皮的狼!"你伤害了我，还一笑而过……"I sang the stupid song time and time again,it is true that your shiny smile cheated me,but now,I am wake up!You could play dirty,but I will fight back!

I still could not forget the first time I saw you,you are totally motionless(so cool).At first,I really thought that you were a freak!From your face,the only motion I could see was =.=...but your stunning look really attracted me and I could not control myself to fall in love with you.I still remembered that everytime when I played WolfTeam(a kind of shooting game) with you,I always try to use my super accurate sniper gun to shoot your hairless head,but then,everytime when you die I felt very guilty!Finally,I persuaded myself do not shoot your head anymore,instead,I started to snipe your small and cute butt...I really could not delete every wonderful moments which we had have from my brain,but then,I really got hurt,I was hurt by my love,and now,I still can hear the echo which caused my heartbroken...

I remembered that few days ago,when I sat on your chair and tried to share the chair with you,you used you skinny and cute butt "attack" me...I felt the pain when my butt told me that,"Master!!!We are under attack!"I felt a bit angry thus commanded my butt counter-attack and kicked your ass...At the moment,I saw a kind of very very very gay look from the other side staring at us,the look came from Valerian!He seems very enjoyed the "show" brought by us!At that moment,I felt scared as I knew that he fell in love with you...How could I compete with him,even though I was more handsome,rich,smart and muscular,he is the god of gay and the most important thing is he is more gay than me!I knew that I could not satisfy your strong desire and lust,thus,I quit,we are done from now on!Go to find your new partner and leave me alone!

I loved the kind of person who either surname is "Tan" or has tan color skin,to be honestly,you satisfy the both of criteria...As now,you have already left me,I have to make myself move on and I find a new option,he is Russell John Chuah,even though his surname is not "Tan",but his skin is tan!and his butt is more attractive and sexy than you and I really love it!!!Most importantly,he is smarter then you,thus our children can be more smart!!!(I have to think for my next generation)

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This letter is just for fun only,do not treat it seriously:)Neither me nor Yoong Aunn are gays or bisexual,but for Valerian,definitely,he is a gay....he call himself GG(god of gay)...=.=

Today I felt very tired as last night I only slept for 3 hours...ZzZz...I slept at first lesson-HCL,but the stupid teacher scolded me,she said what even my Chinese is strong,but I still got the chance to get lower than A1...Did she try to curse me or what?Just saw what did she write on my composition paper,she wrote I did not write any reason in my composition...What the hell?I used about 200 words to write about the so called "reason",do not tell me that she did not see that...my face was totally =.= at that time...She also tried to show off her Chinese history knowledge on Tuesday...=.=...She said that July 7th in 1937 is the day which Japanese officially start to invade China,then I really wanted to ask her did she know that what is the date of September 18th in 1931?Did she know that what is the date of October 10th in 1934?Did she also know that what is the date of September 9th is 1945?Please do not try to show off your Chinese history knowledge in front of me,okay?Please also do not try to be a historian in front of me as I kept on learning those things since I was 4 years old...=.=

Anyway,one thing made me very happy was yesterday she finally talked to me and clarified the relationship between me and her...Even though I had been rejected again,I did not feel very sad,at least the reason why she rejected me was not because I got an ugly face...xD...I said I would use my heart bet on her again and she really did not make me disappointed:)As promise,I would respect her choice,even I really did not want to give up,but she was right,no one could force her.She said time could heal the wounds,maybe this principle suited to most people?but definitely,I belonged to those special people...Time coundn't let me forget about her as I did love her,but I won't treat her rejection as a wound,I would keep it as a beautiful memory...My friends asked me will I really give up on her or will me go to find another girl?I said I didn't know where is my next station...a bit lost,anyway,一切随缘 and we are still friends:)

Busy!!!I need to finish up the stupid physics pratical file by tonight...I hate the stupid SPA!!!

Tagboard:
To JM:Do not support the stupid penguin...xD...We are humans...but she's just a bird who cannot fly...=.=...also,forget the part I try to kiss and hug someone,better delete it from your brain FOREVER...that kind of memory definitely waste your brain space...From now on,no one knows there got such thing...xD

To Promiser198:LOL,of course I still know you,I got super memory...haha,do you still playing Maple now?I quit for long time...

To huihui:You are such a penguin...=.=...next time I should not use penknife chase after you,I will use shotgun hunt you!!!xD

Recently,I talked about a lot of sad things on my blog,it was ture that I was very sad these days and I promise you that my bad mood will continue.Today,as some people always got misunderstanding or wondered what kind of girl I really like,now,I will show you what is my standard.

(1)She must be very 乖,this is really important to me as I don't want the kind of crazy girl to be my girlfriend!Crazy girl will drive my life crazy...xD
(2)She must be understanding and caring:)
(3)She must act as a girl,I want a girl to be my girlfriend but not a boy!
(4)She must be nice and kind:)
(5)She must be very faithful as I hope I can marry her when she is ready:)
(6)She must be very beautiful!I don't mean that she is the kind of super beauty who has a sweet face or hot figure.I am not such a superficial guy,she is beautiful means she can just be a normal person with a normal face,but she must make me think that she is beautiful...=.=...Hard to explain...Hope you can understand...xD
(7)She must love me!but not love the money in my wallet or the power of my family...
All of these 7 points are the things she must have...and now,I will list some optional requirements:
(1)She can play piano?
(2)She is sweet and cute?
(3)She is blur?Everyone knows that smart girl is really hard to deal with...
(4)She is a 半糖主义者？This means that we can give each other freedom and space.I don't like the kind of girl everyday call you go out to shopping or eating as I am also very busy>.<
(5)She is higher than 160cm?
(6)She is not fat...Sorry,I don't mean that fat is bad or ugly...xD
(7)She has long hair?I just have the special feeling to those long hair girls...>.<

Haha...these are my 14 requirements,half of the 14 is standard but another half of 14 is optional.I don't know whether my standard is too high or not but in fact I ever met such girls who fit these requirements.Actually,I think her character is more important than her appearance!But sometimes,you know,even she doesn't fit all of the standard requirements,I still will fall in love with her...Maybe this is because the power of love makes me lower my standard?Anyway,I think those requirements for almost 1 hour...=.=...Some people always say that I like sexy girl,I am really sorry,they are definitely wrong...xD

Tagboard:
To JM:lol...forget about I use penknife chase after hui hui la.I can use penknife chase after her everyday even I am not drunk,as sometimes,I have the crush to kill her...Just kidding...xD...the girl who is kissed and hugged by me must be very lucky loh...HaHa..She is the chosen one!!!But I really cannot remember that I try to kiss and hug someone...=.=...You all want to see me got drunk again?Okay,I will think about it.
To hui hui:It's showtime now,but i still suffer from the pain and cannot find any feelings...I need to transform to god form as fast as I can!!!

Finally,my father was totally recovered from his stamoch pain.I was very glad to see that he could cook for us again(his cooking skills are much more better than my mum's).Now,he is cooking at the kitchen and I can feel the sweet smell:)

Anyway,if you ask me what kind of man I want to be,definitely,I will say I want to be the same kind of man like my father:)He is a responsible,strong,smart and successful man who always put his career and family at first position.I started to respect him since I was very young,at that time,I always heard my nerghbours and his friends talking about him.They always said that he was such a genius who they never saw before,for them,my father seems already became a lengend.He was the only one person who could get full marks for all of his 7 subjects during the time he studyed in London.Even now,when people talking about him,they still use "前无古人，后无来者".I know it was a bit exaggerate but it was true that till now,no one can break his record.I still remembered that every year when his company choose the best employee of the year,he always inside the list(actually,I don't care whether he can get the cup or not,I more interest in the premium...Just kidding...xD).He always be a model role for others and he always tried to make himself more perfect(that's why even he was working,he still tried to study and got Master degree).

My maternal grandmother always said that,"he is a real man!I am very happy that my daughter can marry him!"That's why they always expect me a lot,they hope that I can achieve more than my father..."虎父无犬子","老子英雄儿好汉"they always said those words to encourage me...But untill now,I think that I still cannot do better than him,I could continue getting level top one in my high school life,I could continue getting 5 subjects level top one in my high shool,but I really could not get full marks in 7 subjects(I only learn 6 subjects...=.=...in fact,I even cannot get 1 full mark among 6...T.T) .

Anyway,I try to be as good as my father.Even though I cannot be as smart as him(I am a stupid boy...=.=),I promised myself that I would achieve more in the future!

Still suffering from having been rejected...Just came back from gym and boxing for almost half hour...Now,I felt better but the sandbag must felt very pain...T.T...As I use my full power to hit the sandbag everytime(there already got blood clot in my right hand back...Am I try to torture myself?).There also got a stupid people asked me whether I am interested in joining boxing team...=.=...he said I got the potential to be a good fighter(I have already proved this 8 years ago!)...Was he kidding me?I didn't want to be a fighter as I did not want to get the Parkinson'Disease...

Tagboard:
To huihui:I am so kind and nice to you,how could I chase after you with a penknife?Also,I didn't try to kiss and hug anybody...=.=

To PAHELOHHHHH:It's true that dreams don't mean anything.but then,the dreams still make me very sad...T.T

To YA:Ya,it's ture that there are plenty of fish in the sea,but the problem is everytime when I fishing,I could not get the fish I want,and the fishes which I don't want always come to find me...=.=...They even jump into my boat from the sea and make my boat sink...Also,be careful,there are sharks in the sea...xD

I do not know why recently I am so unlucky...It seems that Miss Lucky broke up with me and Miss Unlucky started to fall in love with me...=.=...The bad luck not only effect me but also my family(that's what I did not want to see).Firstly,My father's stock make a loss of totally $10000 till now.Secondly,I was rejected by Hwa Chiong Junior College,the people who rejected me said every subjects of mine were quite good and acceptable except the stupid(I add this word) English,he said if I could get A2 and above,they would like to accept me...I really did not know whether the person got brain or not,if my English could get A2 and above,my average score would be at least 80.Also,if my English result was so good,my three sciences would not just hang in between 75 to 80,they could be higher...At that situation,definately,I would not choose Hwa Chiong...=.=...Thirdly,my right foot got injury and I had to stay at home for almost whole June holiday,no more basketball,soccer,tennis and swimming,the kind of life was really drive me crazy.Forthly,I was rejected by a girl,that was painful...T.T...And now,my bad luck seems already effected my father again,he got serious sick...

Everything started since yesterday noon,he came back home with a painful face.He did not eat anything at all and went to his bedroom,he was really streaming with sweat at that time and he said his abdomen area was very painful.I checked and made sure that the place which got problem was his stomach.At first,I thought he was just eat something wrong and thus I went to Bedok and bought medicine for him.I believed that he could recover soon if he had a good rest...My mother was totally panic.In fact,both of us know that my father's health state was not very good since when I was very young.I did not go for tuition as if there really something going wrong,my mother could not settle it.I stayed at home and did traditional Chinese medicine massage for him.Usually,the massage worked very well on stomach pain but this time,it did not work at all...I knew something start to going wrong but I cheated my mother that everthing was fine(I just did not want her to be panic as panic did not help at all),my face was very calm though I started to worry about him and I tried to persuade my father go to hospital,but he refused to do so.I knew the reasons,he was so ungenerous to himself as he did not want to pay the medical bills.

I always told him that he should be more generous to himself as even world economy was down,our economy was still very good and could pay for the "expensive" medical bills.Even though,he still refused to listen to me.I pretended to be very angry and said:"Don't try to be the so called lonely hero or ironman,OK?Your body and health were more important than money,just listen to me and go to see doctor now!"But he still refused to do so,I knew that my father is always be the kind of person who was kind to me and my mother but treat himself very badly...I called one of his friend and he brought some good medicine for my father at night,but the medicine still could not solve the problem...Finally,he could not bear the pain anymore and after he suffered for more than 8 hours,he agreed to go to the hospital.His friend drove him here and what made me unhappy was-after a simple check,the stupid doctor just said it was stomach problem!I was totally =.=...I knew this thing 8 hours ago and now he used the kind of serious tone told me obvious fact again?He gave my father some medicine,and the fact was they were all useless!!!

At midnight,I had to follow him go to airport as even he was sick,he still need to go to sign to let the plane take off.As he could not drive,I drove his car instead of him,I thought this was my first time drive his car since last time I crashed his baby BMW on a pole when I reversing the car(He did not scold me at that time but did not allow me drive his car anymore...T.T)I drove very carefully,only 60 km/h...=.=...that was turtle speed...but then,safety first...When the time we went back home was almost 2 am...Even I was tired,I still cannot fall into sleep as I really worried about him...

Anyway,he feels better now as he went to another hospital and found a wise doctor this morning.I was glad to see that he can drive car again...and tonight I don't need to be his private driver and bodyguard,but I will miss the feelings when I drive his car...T.T...I hope that I can suffer the pain instead of him as he's the one who I love most,he's already an old man and cannot suffer too much pain...By the way,to my friends,do not to close to me recently as I don't want to spread the unluck virus to you:)

Last night I just could not stop myself to continue thinking of her,I even dreamt of her and thus,I did not rest well.I really got hurt,really,even I tried to let it go,but I did not think I can free myself in short time.I woke up at 5am today and could not fall into sleep again,I felt very numb and heartless,actually,I felt like a zombie.Luckily,I did not feel very hungry,otherwise,I would go out and bite people everywhere...=.=...My father took my mother go to IMM to shopping and would go back by afternoon.I did not have mood to study and even play games,so I just sat on bed and looked at the sea through window blankly.

In fact,the whole morning I was quite okay,but the funny,stupid and silly things started to happen after noon.Firstly,I felt very hungry,so I need to cook by myself,but then,I found that even though I put my heart into refrigerator,I still had the bitter taste in my chest!Therefore,I opened a box of Ferrero Rocher and ate all of them as lunch(totally 25 "golden balls")>.<
I woke up at about 5pm and my head was really painful,at that time,I realized that I got drunk just now...=.=...My father has already came back home and I found that he was emoing on the sofa."I know that these days you feel quite bad,but you should not anyhow pour my wine into toilet!"he said to me peacefully."I did not pour your precious collection into toilet,instead,I drank them all"My father was totally stunning...O.O..."Since when you learn how to drink and do you have any idea about what did you drink?"he asked me again..."I just learnt how to drink and I don't know what wine I drank just now."...My father's face is really =.= for a few minutes and said,"you just drank a Remy Martin Louis 13 which cost me more than $2000."I apologized to my father and actually,he did not try to blame me or scold me."Anyway,you are happy now?I wanna cry...but don't do such stupid thing next time,okay?"He said to me.

Why everytime I try to learn how to drink but always fail?Good question!The frist time I drank wine is 10 years ago,I accidently drank only a little wine and got drunk...I remebered it happen in Chinese New Year and even though outside is very cold,I felt very hot!!!(It is very weird to feel very hot in a cold winter...)And then,I slept for whole afternoon...After I woke up,my grandpa said to my father,"what a pity,my grandson doesn't have potential to be a good drinker..."Second time I drank was last year,as we managed to do a physics project and need a wine bottle,so I drank the whole bottle of low alcohol wine...After that,my group member got scared.My face turned to very red and I try to hug and kiss somebody(this is what they told me but I don't believe as I won't so easy to give my first kiss to someone),I started to moonwalking and singing and maybe it was looks like MJ's show.They even took videos of me(they are very bad!!!).After that,I used color papers cut a lot of hearts and they used hearts which is cut by me as a decoration of the project=.=...

Anyway,I won't try to drink anymore,it is not because I will get drunk,it is because my father will get heart attack..."You drink Remy Martin Louis 13 as apple juice?OMG!!!You are the most horrible people in this world"This is what my father said,after he said this,he went to lock up all his precious wine collection...but unfortunately,I think I know the password of his safe .

Today is Friday!For me,Friday means a lot,it is because tomorrow do not need to go to school and I do not need to wake up at 5 am!ROCKS!!!:):):)

Today I heard that Janna said I was try to hiding my true feelings...Hmm...and Hmm...and another Hmm...and I believed that she was right as I really pretend to be very happy.HAHAHA...I cheat myself again...xD...Anyway,do not worry about me:)as I am very strong(both mentally and physically!),thanks all the comforts and help which were given by Ben,Hongsen,Janna,Winnie and others.It is true that I cannot let it go so fast(maybe I need 3 or more years)as I am the kind of people who treasure love too much,but I will do my best to free myself from the pain.(I can achieve this by removing my heart from my chest...BLEEDING!!!)

I would not hate the girl who hurt me as she did not make me fall in love with her(met her and fell in love her was just a beautiful mistake in my life...xD),the whole thing was caused by myself and Cupid.Now,let us talk about Cupid.I really want to complain about him!!!Firstly,he always use a piece of cloth cover his eyes,thus he makes love become blind(Can he just take off the piece of cloth?Does he try to be cool or what...=.=)!Secondly,his shooting skill is really really very bad,sometimes,he just anyhow shoot us(Maybe he should try to use sniper gun with scope instead of his bow!),and I think I got a shoot on my ass...T.T...so please aim first then shoot,okay?(He covers his eyes,so how can he aim accurately?Good question!!!=.=)Lastly,he never think before he shoots his "love arrows",can he just take a little time to think about whether the targets which choosen by him is match or not?The magic arrows are on his hands and please do not make us heartbreak...because it is really hurt and painful!!!Anyway,I have already throw my heart into the refrigerator,I will frozen it for some time and during this period of time,no matter how "hot" the girl is,she cannot melten my cold heart:)

After all,luckily,I found back my feelings to face examinations.The feelings are very important to me as it can secure that I get A1 in most of my subjects.Now,I felt very confident and I believed that I can achieve all the goals which I made in 'O' level:)

HAHA...After yesterday's depression,now I feel really great.In fact,I felt quite bad in this morning and afternoon,during the math lesson,I was totally get lost.What was worse,teacher used the whole math lesson to do a test...=.=...I stared at the paper and my brain was totally blank,actually,I really did not have the mood to do the test paper as I was still thinking of her. 30 minutes passed very fast and I only did a few questions,I thought that the questions which I did was already enough for me to pass.My A math always remain at high standard and often can get full marks,but now,Mr. Full Mark was really confused as I might only just pass this time!

"What's wrong with me?"I asked myself,"Is this the kind of life I really want?"At that moment,all the confusions in my brain disappeared and my brain suddenly became very clear."I should give up on her!"I told myself confidently even though I was still love her."For me,studying was more important than any other things."The kind of feeling which just pass my A math stimulated my brain and made me wake up!

To be honestly,I really got lost after I fell in love with her,I became stupid and dumb and really did not want to put any focus on studying.I have somnambulated in my whole June holiday and did not touch my text books at all!But now,the real Ma Sai is back,I remember all of the goals which I made for myself and all the promises which I made to myself,I knew that I had forgotten all of them,but now,everything become so clear and even more clear than before.I was so happy that finally I found back the real me!

My guarding angel is back again,even though she just recovered from H1N1...=.=...She gave me power and made me become stronger.I heard that phoenix was reborn from the dust,and me,Ma Sai was reborn from the fire of hell."Welcome back to earth"I told myself as I just came back from hell.It is ture that the positive and optimistic Ma Sai was murdered by love,it is also ture that I had fallen into the hell and became very negative,but now,I was reborn and I become more positive and optimistic which I never have been.I came back to earth just because I have not finished everthing I promised to myself.Now,my results are far far away from the O lvl target which I set for myself,as there are still 3 months left,audience please take a seat and watch Ma Sai how to use these 3 months to change my future!For me,it's show time now!!!

By the way,as I just found back myself,so I will join my basketball friends and go to KTV have some fun tonight:)

What if I get rejected by her?That what I am thinking now.Simple question but hard to answer.Will I get heart attack at the moment when she says "NO"?I hope that some kind people can use canno blow off my heart first brfore she reject me...=.=...You may ask since when I become so negative?To be honestly,the confident and optimistic Ma Sai has already murdered by love!

"Cheer up!Man!"I heard the sound come from heaven,but I think recently,my guarding angel either get sick or not at home as she is not guarding me anymore.I try to tell myself that there still have hope,even only a little,but then,the dark clouds on the sky block the only hope I can see.Therefore,I feel hopeless.

Anyway,sky is no long blue for me,water is no long clear for me,air is no long clean for me,I feel like died.Ma Sai is really depressed.Now,I get insomnis because of her,I totally become a vampire,cannot fall into sleep at night!God seems don't like to help as he said I am not a faithful followers,but the demons in the hell told me that,"they have already left a place for me in hell!"Whatever...What is the difference between earth and hell?I am already become a half died man as my heart is died.I told demons that,"Take whatever you want,my soul,my body,just please leave my died heart in the grave peacefully as I still love her..."

I HATE EXTRA LESSONS!!!Everyday stay till so late,extra lessons are really very extra!Since teacher told us we would have extra lessons again,I felt that my beautiful and joyful life will end soon,and I would go back hell again!Sometimes,I really believed that I should not take triple science,I hate this kind of stressful life.Anyway,if teachers want to drag me to hell,I just go in bravely,it is because there always have some ways to escape from hell,right?Hopefully,I can go back earth soon.

The extra lessons really destroy my revise plan,I prefer to study by myself rather than listen to teachers.I just think study by myself is a more efficient way.Why teachers always like us to go back school?I know they are kind and want to teach us more,but did they ever think that their extra lessons are suitable for everyone?老师领进门，修行靠个人！I really think that I need more time to study by myself...